My Crowning Glory: Motherhood in the Hardest Season

Laura
Dec 13
3 min read

“Strength isn’t born in comfort—it’s forged in the fire you never wanted to walk through.”

A Beginning Unlike Any Other

At forty years old, during a snowstorm, I cradled three newborns at once and wondered if I had enough strength for all of them. Three years earlier, I had welcomed a baby daughter with gratitude and calm certainty, convinced I understood what motherhood required. I was wrong. No book, plan, or earlier experience could have prepared me for the tidal wave of responsibility, exhaustion, and fierce love that came with four children. In this season, motherhood wasn’t a title—it was a proving ground for endurance, faith, and the very core of who I was.

Lessons No Book Could Teach

Motherhood teaches lessons the neat pages never mention. It stretches patience until it feels paper-thin, rearranges priorities without asking permission, and demands a depth of love you don’t know you have until you’re required to give it. At thirty-seven, my husband (40) and I welcomed a baby girl—grateful and grounded, aware that parenting later in life carried its own weight. Three years later, our world expanded overnight when I gave birth to triplets, and everything I thought I understood about resilience and responsibility was stripped down and rebuilt, piece by piece.

The Physical, Emotional, and Financial Toll

Physically, my body went far beyond the limits I believed were fixed. Emotionally, I lived in a constant state of alert—listening for the next concern, the next appointment, the next setback. Financially, the strain was unrelenting. At one point, I calculated that I spent nearly forty percent of my time at the UW Children’s Specialty Clinic. The clinic corridors became familiar. Medical terminology turned into a second language. Waiting rooms didn’t feel like second homes—they felt like prisons of uncertainty, where time crawled, and fear sat heavy in the air. And yet, even there, hope smoldered—small, stubborn, and alive.

A Marriage Under Pressure

Our marriage didn’t simply bend under the weight of those years—it cracked in places we never expected. The pressure was relentless: hospital visits, sleepless nights, and decisions that carried more weight than we thought we could bear. There were moments when the silence between us felt louder than words, when exhaustion made even kindness hard to find. And yet, through every fracture, we fought to hold on. We didn’t always do it gracefully, but we did it together. Each challenge left scars, but those scars became the steel that strengthened our foundation. We learned that love isn’t proven in easy seasons—it’s forged in fire.

Medical Challenges and Small Victories

Medical challenges common to multiple births shaped every decision our family made. Schedules revolved around therapies, specialists, evaluations, and follow-ups. Progress was measured in inches, not miles. Some days, success meant simply getting through the day upright and intact. And yet—this was the most meaningful work of my life. Tiny milestones—steady breaths, a clear scan, a new sound, a brave step—felt like miracles. In those inches, hope grew tall.

Choosing Homeschooling: A Practical Act of Love

Homeschooling wasn’t romantic or idealistic—it was practical love. It came from experience, age, and a clear-eyed understanding of what my children truly needed. It gave us room to pivot when hospital visits broke the rhythm, to pause lessons for rest or recovery, and to pace learning in a way that honored each child as a person, not a checklist.

There were days when doubt pressed hard—when exhaustion blurred judgment, and fear whispered that I wasn’t enough. But doubt met its match in quiet victories, small breakthroughs, and the unmistakable growth of children learning not only academics, but resilience, courage, and grace.

No Regrets, Only Gratitude

I don’t regret a single mile of this road. Not the sleepless nights. Not the hospital stays. Not the sacrifices that required saying no to comfort, ease, or conventional paths. If given the choice, I would do it all again without hesitation. These children are my crowning glory—not because the road was easy, but because it was worth every step.